'Wound Analogy' 

(adapted from https://www.elenadtherapy.com)

Let's imagine you are running along a country path.  You fall and trip, grazing your knee.  When you look, you see the wound is red, sore, and raw.  It is painful and covered with mud and dirt from the path.

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Imagine that you say to yourself -  “try not to think about it”, “forget it ever happened”, “leave the past in the past”, etc. It hurts but you need to get on with things.  You put a plaster on the wound - probably a nice, big one that fully covers it so that it can't be seen - and carry on with your run. 

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Do you remember those play ground injuries that would get covered in little bits of tarmac and dirt from your school uniform? They were fine if they weren't properly cleaned, right? Not quite. If a wound isn't cleaned and cared for, it will likely get infected.  And an infected wound will cause more pain and will need more care original graze. The same is true for emotional wounds.

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But when emotional wounds like developmental trauma are never addressed, never acknowledged, never discussed, never grieved, never talked about or "cleaned out"... then the wound can become emotionally infected.  It can feel like agony each time someone brushes close to it. 

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Psychotherapy is similar to the process of removing the plaster, cleaning out the wound, (which makes the pain more intense), and beginning the painful process of healing. It's not easy, nor is it pleasant. Each time the bandage is changed and the wound is dressed (i.e. each time you attend a therapy session), the healing process continues. Days pass, and eventually, a scab forms. A little while after that, the scab falls off, and you are left with a scar.

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Just like these scars, you will always have reminders of your trauma - You can never erase what you lived through and will never forget about the trauma you experienced. But, with effective therapy, it is possible to heal your pain.